Are you a Macho Man?

There are many men who live their life as a tough guy. Tough guys appear strong, but their strength is actually overcompensation for feelings of inferiority and inadequacy.

They do not demonstrate manliness by making useful contributions to the community, nor by being a cooperative husband, nor by setting appropriate examples for his children to follow.

His overcompensations manifest themselves as declarations of toughness, often followed by challenges for others to prove same. These tests of strength often take the form of:
• Bar-room brawls
• Beer drinking contests
• Road Rage.
• Contests to see who can endure useless self-inflicted pain.

Those who ascribe to the tough guy mentality are also characterized by:
1. The endless confusion of cooperation with submission;
2. The tendency to perceive faults and imperfections as weaknesses,
3. The conviction that emotions are for women and sissies,
4. The lifelong inability to enjoy loving and supportive relationships,
5. The tendency to confuse bravado with bravery,
6. A tendency to confuse conceit with confidence,
7. A tendency to confuse isolation with independence,
8. A tendency to confuse interdependence with dependence,
9. A tendency to confuse irresponsibility with freedom,
10. A tendency to confuse self-indulgence with happiness,

For most sufferers, the antidote to their role as a tough guy or macho man is time. In time they age and are forced to find other, more appropriate and mature means of defining themselves in the world. Many such alumni succeed in outgrowing these carryovers from their adolescent years and became self-respecting adults.

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Shared by: Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger

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