Barb had been trying for years to improve her relationship with her mother, Sandra. Barb tried everything. She would go over there for a quiet dinner with Sandra and then find herself being criticized for neglecting her husband and son. Barb tried staying away. She caught hell for that too.
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Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger August 5, 2020
Many people who have to live or work with the chronically angry feel unprepared to cope with their titanic temper tantrums. When we don’t know what to do when faced with anger, we have an unfortunate tendency to make up our own interventions. This DIY approach to cope with someone’s monumental rage is usually
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger July 31, 2020
When people are upset, the words they use rarely convey the issues and needs at the heart of the problem. When we listen for what is felt as well as said, we connect more deeply to our own needs and emotions, and to those of other people. Tips for being
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger July 23, 2020
If you are out of touch with your feelings or so stressed that you can only pay attention to a limited number of emotions, you won’t be able to understand your own needs. If you don’t understand your deep-seated needs, you will have a hard time communicating with others and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger July 20, 2020
Why is it that we fall in love with our dream-mate and then spend the next forty years yelling, fighting and screaming as if we had married our worst enemy? It makes no sense. It makes even less sense to get a divorce and marry someone just like the first
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger March 4, 2020
If your loved one came home with a cut on his finger, you would know where to put the Band-Aid. If he had an upset stomach, you would give him an antacid. What do you do for someone who is heartbroken, enraged, guilt ridden, furious, or frustrated? Where do you
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 28, 2020
Jerome wanted to know why he still felt so badly about his parents’ divorce. He couldn’t understand it. He was ten years old at the time. He came to counseling to begin his search for the answer. Therapist: “What is the worst thing about your parents’ divorce?” Jerome: “It feels
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger February 3, 2020
Dr. Aimee Daramus shares her insight and expertise in this guest blog about managing emotions when someone you care about has a mental illness. When you have a loved one with a mental illness, you’re going to have a lot of thoughts and feelings, and you may not feel that
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger January 20, 2020
Rejection, it’s what causes so many negative emotions from shyness, to depression, to anger and even despair. Rejection is never easy to accept. In matters of romance, rejection can do even more damage. When you are rejected by someone you deeply want, it can make you feel worthless, unwanted and
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger November 20, 2019
Let me tell you about Mr. and Mrs. R, a couple I recently saw in my office. When they came in, they recounted an argument they’d had the previous Friday. They’d started the day in bed, cuddling and snuggling affectionately. But then Mr. R felt his wife resisting. He snapped
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger October 29, 2019
Accusing our loved one of being “overly sensitive” or having “no sense of humor” doesn’t change the fact that they are feeling pain because of something we have said or done. Guest blogger Stephanie Quattrocki shares her thoughts on the impact anger has on relationships and how to heal. “I
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger October 18, 2019
The media is full of experts giving people advice. They tell us how to be good parents, loving spouses, supportive friends. The press is full of tips for handling our aging parents, our difficult bosses. The problem is most of it doesn’t work. There are many reasons why superficial, impersonal
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger October 8, 2019
Maybe someone accuses you of untrue things behind your back. Maybe your business partner steals from you. Maybe a manager fails to uphold a promise. Maybe your partner has an affair. In cases involving a personal betrayal, keep in mind one important fact: Forgiveness is not the same thing as
Read More Shared by Aaron Karmin, LCPC, Contributing Blogger September 15, 2019